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REVELATIONS 20:5

Ask me things!

rev205:

haha guess what i still wanna die but now im 20 

Woaaahhhh I’m 24 now and guess what im still as bad as ever!!!!!!!! Wooopiee!!! 

burning-remiel:

The things none of us talk about but we all feel

What of those times when you feel like you’re something coiled underneath skin? You think, this body isn’t mine. You think, I’m not human. I’m not human. I’m not human. And it’s terrifying. I feel dangerous. Please, don’t let me be a monster.



What of those times when your wings come and go? I use to feel them as completely as I feel my arms. I haven’t felt a thing in months. Until now, an ache blooms. It fades. The ebb and flow of our connection to our pasts, it hollows.



What of the feeling of being watched? I know my Father is with me every step I take, yet I cannot help but curse his name on my worst days. The guilt settles in my stomach and I sometimes find myself panicking, what if the humans are right? What if He does not forgive? What if He does not understand?



What of the distance awakening brings? I feel so far away from everyone I know. I have always felt separate but now I feel as though we do not even breathe the same air. Sometimes earth’s axis spins them away from me and I wonder if remembering isn’t just a curse.



What of the righteous fury injustice hails? I cannot bare to watch the vulnerable preyed apon, I cannot remain calm as I see unnecessary pain inflicted. But I am woefully underpowered and I can no longer protect them as I once did.


What of the unnameable pain of no longer remembering your complete form? I know I was vast and as bright as the stars. I know I was shifting and changing. But this is all just words, I cannot witness the majesty of angels, my mind protests against things to large for its comprehension.

Nsfw

Tfw When u figure out a fetish that makes ur heart go doki doki

melisica:

“Go to work, send your kids to school, follow fashion, act normal, walk on the pavement, watch t.v., save for your old age, obey the law, repeat after me: I am free.” (by pshab)

(via melisica)

So I went to Mass for the first time this morning so here are my thoughts™

mysticismmess:

jmwbb:

lifeinacatholicgirlshoes:

gracefullysaint:

There are so many little kids and they are all so freaking adorable I love them  

There was a family in the front row who had like four little kids who all looked like they were under the age of 5 and there were so many babies and little kids oh my goodness

Singing. Wow.

Like everyone sang so amazingly?! How????

Like is there some kind of rule that you have to sing for Simon Cowell and earn his approval before you can become catholic?! Because everyone in the whole room had the voices of angels I kid you not

I was seriously not anticipating how much singing there was

Lots of candles

Stained glass is hard to figure out what it is when you’re right next to it, you have to stand back a bit to see what it’s showing

SO MUCH STAINED GLASS

The kneeler things was very helpful. At first I thought they must be so people’s knees don’t hurt when they kneel, which I’m sure is helpful too, but it also helps short people like me see over the pews.

Apparently at one time or another I have befriended several catholics at my school, all of whom were there. (A guy I was friends with freshman year was one of the alter servers! I had no clue!!!)

Also catholic teens are the coolest, they get so excited answering questions and talking about saints

I apparently need to learn to read music notes. I’m used to just listening to the tune of music and singing along… they have music notes I must learn how to read them so I can sing too

When I was walking up to the church I was terrified (mostly cuz there were People and I did not see my friend at first)

When priest raises the Host and the Chalice up I overwhelmingly wanted to fall flat on my face in awe and fear and wonder

There was so much bible in it like wow

Even in parts that weren’t explicitly reading from the bible, the words that we were saying or that the priest was saying I completely recognized from the bible

The whole church was absolutely breathtaking, there was stained glass everywhere and a statue of Mary holding baby Jesus and then another statue of I think St. Thomas Aquinas

There were Mary statues everywhere around the church, like I counted at least three smaller ones hidden around

There was a huge crucifix in the front and I couldn’t take my eyes off of it for a long time

EVERYONE IS SO NICE I LOVE THEM

My mom got mixed up and thought the priest was the Pope… no Mother, Pope Francis was definitely not there, you would see it in the news if he was lol

The priest seemed super cool (apparently he only got out of seminary two or three years ago, he’s really young) and his homily was great and he also looks just like Andy from the Office

Everyone’s parents are so nice too, like all of the teenagers were talking about their parents and when they didn’t know the answer to one of my questions they went off to find their parents (who somehow were all like experts who either currently or used to work at the church?)

These catholic people keep trying to give me food it’s great

After Mass there was a Coffee Hour thing where we all just sat around and chatted and they gave us food (cookies, fruit, etc.) and drinks and coffee and stuff.

And then I got invited to get pancakes after midnight Mass next week

Are they trying to bribe me with food?

I saw one of the friends who I went to homecoming with there!!! he’s legit one of the nicest people ever

Everything was so beautiful and overwhelming I felt kinda like how you feel when you stare at the sun and and the sun is beautiful but it burns into your eyes and everywhere you look you kinda just see the shadow of the sun? I felt like the beauty of the whole mass was kinda burned into my soul

I couldn’t hardly talk for a solid ten minutes afterwards I was so overwhelmed with beauty and awe

The Mass was partially in latin and partially in english and it was super cool, like there were some english songs and some latin songs, and then some prayers and stuff in latin and some in english it was so cool, and I had a thing that had the english translation of latin next to it

I do not know how to pronounce latin but I tried anyways

I also don’t know how to read music notes, I’m used to just listening to the tune and singing but they gave us music with music notes so I need to learn it

There were several people wearing veils (including a couple little girls it was adorable)

I couldn’t stop myself from smiling, the entire time

I was terrified walking up to the church but as soon as I stepped inside I was confused and overwhelmed but also so incredibly joyful

In Conclusion

It was legit one of the most breathtaking and amazing experiences of my life,  it was beautiful in the truest sense of the word. The Mass was beautiful, Jesus was beautiful, the church was beautiful, the people were beautiful, everything was beautiful.

It was like Pure Beauty + LOTS of children + JESUS + singing so much

God is so good y’all

Praying for you!

YES! re: how much bible there is in mass, one of my favourite parts is where we all say “Lord I am not worthy that You should enter under my roof, but only say the word and my soul shall be healed” a bit before the Eucharist. By also re: singing sheet music, just try to follow the notes how other people sing them while also trying to follow them on paper with your eyes to conceptualize what’s going on. I’ve never ever sang or played sheet music before in my life, but I’ve started to pick it up pretty fast from mass. This post is so wholesome and great, praying for you!

This is too wholesome and pure omg

(via gildedmouths)

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